Time to get my arse into gear!

A loss is always sad, and I think I've taken a bashing this time. When something hits you hard, nothing else is important. In this case my little bit of me (here, of course), has suffered neglect. I didn't feel like making witty..in fact I wondered whether I ever did.  How did I become so serious?  But I'm back...I've seen the light!

My month away was productive though.  I haven't just been sitting around twiddling my fingers! We've been very busy. We've been clearing up the garden and painting the house.  Not only has it taken us months, but it's made me realise that all this cleaning and painting is such a waste of time.  I really must get myself together and make Miriam do something for her keep.  Peewee has had his doodahs cut off which has now made me wonder whether I should have done so as he would have had beautiful babies.

Pee Wee in his buster collar...seriously comfortable!

For the first time this year, I decided that I should visit the shops and revamp my wardrobe.  It's not something that I was looking forward to as I seem to have expanded a bit, but the old gear was becoming seriously stretched. I could no longer squeeze into those jeans that I insisted fitted me. They dug into my waist and after 2 hours were so painful I had to take them off again!   The bottom was so low slung that you can now see my pants!!  Might have been attractive on a 20 something, but this big bird ain't even 30!!  It sure isn't a pretty sight.

I was due out in the evening to meet some old friends and didn't want them to be too upset at the sight of my seriously large bosom!!  Finding a dress designed to cover the fat bits, with sleeves to slim down the flabby bingo wings and a high necked top (but not too high so that it accentuates the double chin (s)!!) was the plan.  Clearly I have body dismorphia and I think I'm two sizes smaller than I am.  I hold up jeans in front of me and think they'll be too big...when I get them to the dressing room, I can't even get them over my knees!!

After trying on a thousand items and discarding them, I trudged home and picked out a LBD that was a million years old and a silver coat (sounds disgusting, but I assure you it was the dogs!), with 3/4 sleeves which had been worn to a wedding the previous year!  With a bit of make-up and a hairbrush, I was ready...and I didn't look too bad.....or so I thought! 

The next day (after the event), pictures popped up on facebook!  Pictures which would never have seen the light of day if I had my way.  Pictures so horrendous that they would have BH running for cover if he ever finds my password and see's them.  I'm ashamed of myself.  I'm ashamed of how I thought that pulling faces would detract from the blubber that has now become me. It appears that I'm a laughing stock according to the comments made on the posts...and I can't do anything but laugh with them without seeming a killjoy! My face looks like it's been punched several times as I'm so puffy and the eyes I thought I had have disappeared from view.  It's not a problem though...I can still see through the slits!!

So, I've jumped on the Wii...done a bit of skiing and jogging, walked the dogs and eaten lettuce leaves...and I've lost zilch!!  The only thing to do now is have a chat with BB and get a serious talking to. 

What I can't understand though....why didn't anyone tell me????

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